Airplane Etiquette: 5 Should-Be Rules of the Sky

Jason Carr — Fri, 28 Jan 2011 03:07:48 +0000

I’m far from a commercial airline buff, but it doesn’t take a genius to know what is or isn’t socially appropriate when flying in a cramped airplane. I’ve been on my fair share of flights inside and outside of the country, and flying with children really helps you to see the big, ugly picture. In case you need a reminder of what isn’t appropriate when in the air, or if you really can’t figure this stuff out on your own, here’s a list of five things you should or shouldn’t do on your next flight. My wife and I have experienced all of these wonderful situations; most of them we experience on pretty much every trip.

We’d appreciate it if all of those lovely passengers we’ve ridden with would kindly take note of these five things:

1. Never put your seat back.

No, really. Just don’t do it. The minimal comfort you’ll receive from lying back just a little bit more is nothing compared to the discomfort you’ll force onto the unfortunate passenger behind you. Airplane seats are already cramped enough, and you just made a difficult situation that much worse. This is twice as important if you happen to have someone especially tall behind you (like me), or someone with a lap child (me as well). And forget about putting your tray down when the seat in front of you is all the way back.

Finally, remember that if the person in front of you is encroaching on your personal space, that’s no reason to bludgeon the person behind you for the rest of the flight. Just suck it up and take pride in the fact that people clearly like you more than the rude person in front of you, and that person in front of you will probably never have any real friends.

2. Don’t get drunk.

Tight quarters and drunks don’t mix. There’s nothing worse than flying next to someone who has lost their entire sense of reasonable judgement. Not only will you reek of booze, you’ll likely try to play “see how close you can get to the person next to you” as well as “see how much of your exaggerated life story you can share with the person next to you” for the entire flight. This is especially likely and important not to do if there’s an attractive person of the opposite sex in the seat next to you. They’ll likely have to abuse you just to keep their dignity.

3. Sleep unobtrusively, or don’t sleep at all.

You’d be surprised how many people can’t seem to sleep on an airplane without resting some part of their reckless body on the person beside them, or without audibly competing with the jet engines on the plane. Many more people snore loudly than will actually admit that they do, so good luck sleeping next to “Jet Engine” Larry or that creeper who can’t seem to stop using you as his own, distressed pillow.

4. Leave your bad attitude/rotten personality on the ground.

Nothing is more annoying than the bitter old lady who talks back to the flight attendants just because she feels entitled to do whatever she pleases. This attitude/personality is found across both sexes and all age groups, but I have to admit that it seems to be the most common among menopause-laden women. And you get the pleasure of listening to them whine, both directly to the flight attendants and to whomever is lucky enough to sit beside them. These people ruin it for everyone; they’re the reason flight attendants feel the need to be so aggressively authoritative.

5. Don’t let your child scream for the entire flight.

Parents know that children (especially babies) and planes make for difficult situations, but there’s plenty you can do to help the situation. Bring plenty of toys and snacks to keep your child occupied, and if need be, feel free to walk up and down the aisles a bit to comfort your child. Whatever you do, don’t just let the baby scream. I’ve seen parents even put headphones on to drown out the noise of their own screaming child. We’ll put up with some crying understandingly if you’re clearly trying your best to comfort your child, but if you’re too lazy to give your child some attention to shut him or her up then you’re a bad parent and we don’t want you on the plane.

That said, small children and babies can be very difficult to keep happy for long periods of time, so try to at least have a little bit of patience if the parents are obviously trying. Most of the time, they want their child to behave even more than you do.

If you soon have the pleasure of becoming victim to any of these lovely circumstances, take solace in the fact that your plane isn’t cockroach-infested and country-hopping like the propeller-plane-bus-ride I was privileged enough to experience on my seemingly never ending trip to Liberia.

Share your experiences in the comments below. :)

Grand Canyon Photos

Jason Carr — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 00:26:10 +0000

I hope everyone enjoyed our trip as much as I did; it was truly an incredible experience. I keep going through various forms of withdrawal; I miss the tight community we had and the lack of distractions from the outside world. Once more, thanks to everyone who went on the trip for such an amazing experience.

As I receive them, I’ll be posting everyone’s pictures (and maybe videos?) here (with their permission), to make them easy to share. Below you’ll find all of the pictures for easy viewing online, as well a zip file download for each collection.

Photos are after the jump. Feel free to comment on this post, too, if you’re craving some discussion from the trip. :)

Larry Lufkin's Photos

[Download this collection as a zip file]

336 Photos

Tom & Laura Hickey's Photos

[Download this collection as a zip file]

47 Photos

Jason Weaver's Photos

This album contains sub-albums.

Larry Carr's Photos

[Download this collection as a zip file]

143 Photos